Saturday, 28 January 2023

THE WAITING GAME.

I'd just like to thank all of the people who left such kind comments on the last post.

I know a lot of you liked to see  Tom doing his crochet or tapestry.

THANKYOU.

 It's almost a week now since Tom left us and we are sitting here twiddling our thumbs.

It seems that as Asbestosis was mentioned early in his diagnosis the coroner has now got involved.

I personally do not think this was the cause of his demise but I guess they have to investigate these things.

So, we are stuck in a situation that we cannot move on from as all the things that need to be dealt with require the death certificate.

At the same time we have had to notify different people and these things are stopped immediately.

Pension, any benefits etc. 

 Lord knows what people do who have no savings to tide them over until things get settled.

The good thing is I have family around me who are helping to sort everything out and giving me lots of support.



What I didn't mention in the last post was that through all this I had either flu or covid and was really ill and unable to visit Tom in his last days, this was very distressing but Pete, Matt, Penny and Grandson Tom were there for him and Matt had a photo of myself framed and put on his table, we also spoke in video link.
Not ideal, but I could not get out of bed to even make a cup of tea.   Not like me, I can't remember ever feeling so bad apart from having flu in my 20's.

So we are hoping that something is worked out next week and we can begin to get sorted.

Briony
x


21 comments:

  1. My heart really goes out to you and your Family.It is an awful time for you all.You feel helpless in this period of time.Then there is all the things to sort out.It really feels like its a bad dream that you are waiting to wake up from.Just know that we are all thinking of you and sending our love.xxx

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  2. Your illness meaning you couldn't be with Tom must have been so distressing, and then the delays caused by the Coroner having to get involved are just piling on the distress and frustration. Thank goodness you have such a loving and supportive family around you. Keep strong Briony xx

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  3. I am happy to hear you have family that is helping you, that makes a big difference. Sorry for the delays and prayers they will get you the death certificate soon.. So sorry you were so ill and missed being with him his last days..what a blessing we now have video chats available. Hugs and prayers coming your way

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  4. Oh no, sorry to hear you were ill, making everything even more difficult. I hope you’re feeling better now. So glad your family was there for Tom and supporting you now. I hope all the formalities get done soon!

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  5. Waiting is dreadful - you can't begin to settle until you've taken care of Tom to the very end. I do hope you've got over whatever your illness was, what a horrible time to have it. It never rains..etc Chin up Bryony, remember the good times always, there were many, many years of them for you and Tom, and you have love from the family around you, and the kindness and thoughts of lots of us out here. Life can be good again - just different. Much love and hugs, and you're all still in my prayers. Elaine xx

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  6. I hope you are feeling better soon, such a sad situation you are in, lucky you to have family so close. You are in all our thoughts xx

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  7. Oh no! As if you have not been through enough. Perhaps it was a blessing that you could not visit him, it would have been so very hard! And now THIS! I hope they do not have to tear up your home looking for asbestos!! Do you know how long everything will be on hold?

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  8. Oh Briony what a dreadful time to be so ill, but there is such a thing as the sympathetic effect (your immune system fading as your life partner fades such is your stress). FiL life also ended on an asbestos note, but the family was able to notify they waive any possible claim and get things moving again. Thank goodness for supportive family.

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  9. So sorry to hear that you are having to go through all these formalities. I lost my husband to an asbestos related cancer and as it is classed so an industrial disease (he was infected in his teens) the coroner has to be notified in case you want to make an insurance claim, something I am sure you are not thinking about at the moment, I know I wasn't. Take care and rest and get over your illness, and let your family look after you. Jan x

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  10. I feel so sad and sorry that your own ailment got in the way of being with Tom in his last hours. Now you need to cast off his boat and have the funeral etcetera but the legal process has put the brakes on, the boat is still tied up at the jetty. I hope this doesn't last for too long. As expected your family has rallied round for they loved Tom too.

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  11. So sorry to hear you have been ill. I do hope the "authorities" get things sorted soon so that Tom can be "laid to rest". Great that you have a supportive family.

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  12. I'm happy to hear that you have people there to help you through this. You are in my thoughts.

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  13. So sorry that you weren't able to be with your husband in person, but it is must be some consolation that you were able to be there virtually. At a time like this, a supportive family/friends are a great help and comfort. I hope you will feel better soon and that the funeral arrangements will be able to be made.
    Best wishes
    Ellie

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  14. Bless you, my heart hurts for you. Please get well quickly.

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  15. Tom is of an age where he may well have asbestos in his lungs , my dad did and it wasnt found till after his death , he received a payout from the government , well his estate did .

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    1. I guess that is why the corona is involved, still haven't heard anything yet. He did work around asbestos in the 60's and 70's it was rife then wasn't it.

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  16. I am so sorry for your loss. My sister-in-law has sarcoidosis which is a similar thing. Her dad died of it in the 70's/80's. She is suffering and is only 50-ish. Not a pleasant thing to watch.

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    1. It was horrendous Gill. He was diagnosed 5 years ago and did well to keep going for all that time but in the end it was awful for both of us and the kids to see him go from a very large muscular man to nothing. Briony
      x

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  17. Briony, I am just catching up here. I don't know how I missed this news when you first posted it, but let me belatedly say I am so sorry for your loss. I'm also sorry about the circumstances that prevented you from being with Tom in person, but I'm sure he appreciated the video link. Thank goodness for technology! Please keep us posted on how you're doing.

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  18. I've just been catching up with your blog and see that I missed your last post, I'm so very sorry Briony. I hope that things gets sorted out quickly so that you can carry on with everything that needs to be organised, it feels as though you're just sat in limbo otherwise and it's very frustrating at a time when you're grieving and things should run smoothly. I hope you're feeling better yourself now too. Sending a big hug xx

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  19. I am very sorry to hear about your husband. I just loss my husband august of this year. We were married 60 years. It is very hard and I also have family who support me.

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